All Categories - Turning Point Counseling

Marriage Mandate: Part 2 - The Cling Thing –Couples Unite!

11/17/2014

‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.’ Genesis 2:24-25

Years ago as a seminary student, I had a roommate who, for all practical purposes, couldn’t spell or write. Now mind you, I grew up with a host of learning difficulties myself, but Scott surpassed them all. I’d try to proof his papers, but I really couldn’t help. How do you edit something that doesn’t make a lick of sense?

You may think I was critical of Scott but the truth was, I had great admiration for him. You see, Scott just wouldn’t give up. Failing seminary was not a possibility for him. He studied long hours, re-took classes – whatever was required Scott did it.

In a word Scott had amazing – perseverance. Nothing discouraged him, not failing assignments or flunking classes or smarter classmates, Scott was unwilling to stop.

What does a single seminary student have to do with Marriage Mandate #2?

10 Keys to a Happy Marriage

10/24/2014

The fact that Janice and I have been married for 42 years gives me a certain level of credibility in writing this post. Have they all been happy years? Yes, albeit some more so than others. But the important thing is that our love continues to deepen as we look forward to growing old together.

I am fully aware that this list is far from comprehensive, but these keys have been instrumental in helping our marriage become what it is. Hopefully, they will help you have a happy marriage.

1. Love your differences...

MARRIAGE MANDATE: pART 1 - LEAVE YOUR MOTHER AND FATHER

10/21/2014

‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.’ Genesis 2:24-25

Several years ago I counseled a man who explained to me his terrible dilemma. He said, “My mother is in a nursing home about three hours away. I don’t go see her. I feel awful about it because I know that I should honor my parents. When I used to go see her she would criticize me and say horrible things about my wife and kids for hours. She has always resented my wife and has told me repeatedly that I married the wrong person. I can’t handle her stress. I just haven’t gone to see her in the last couple of years.”

FACTS AND FALLACIES OF INTIMACY: PART 5 — CAN I DEPEND ON YOU? YOU PROMISED...AT OUR WEDDING

9/10/2014

FALLACY
My mate should always be there for me, to help me meet all my needs. That’s why we got married – to be help-mates.

FACT
You married a human being; these types are at times unpredictable and unhelpful. Yet, with the proper expectations your marriage can be a very enjoyable experience. Your mate can be a source of great strength, but never the source of your strength.

FACTS AND FALLACIES OF INTIMACY: PART 4 — WHY DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?

9/3/2014

FALLACY
My mate should understand and empathize with most everything that is important to me. If they really love me, this shouldn’t be a problem. The longer we are married the less we will have to explain things to each other.

FACT
As terribly inconvenient as it is, the fact of the matter is that your mate cannot read your mind. What is obvious to you is not always obvious to them – even if you have been married a long time.

FACTS AND FALLACIES OF INTIMACY: PART 3 — how much should i tell my spouse?

8/18/2014

FALLACY
If I let my mate know everything I’ve done and everything I think, it will always lead to rejection.

FACT
In most cases, your spouse already has a very good idea of who you are and your history. You aren’t as good an actor or actress as you think. There are some exceptions to this very tricky issue of "to share or not to share" in marriage.

FACTS AND FALLACIES OF INTIMACY: PART 2 — WHOSE FAULT IS IT - MINE OR YOURS? THE 'HOT POTATO' OF BLAME IN YOUR MARRIAGE

8/15/2014

FALLACY
Everything that goes wrong in our marriage is ALL your fault (or – ALL my fault).

FACT
When things go wrong in our marriage, there are times I am responsible for the problem and times you are. Frequently, we both have some contribution to the problems that we face. We both share some responsibility in working together to solve most of the problems we face.

FACTS AND FALLACIES OF INTIMACY: PART 1 — WILL I LOSE MYSELF IF I'M INVOLVED WITH YOU?

8/12/2014

FALLACY
If I become emotionally, spiritually and romantically involved in a courting relationship, or in marriage - it will always lead to me losing myself and becoming someone I don’t really want to be. I will have to live a false life.

FACT
Healthy dating relationships and healthy marriages enhance the person you were created to be. These relationships will champion your causes and provide support for your life dreams.

THE ART OF PARENTING?

6/12/2014

The more I work with parents as well as parent my own children I have come to the revelation that parenting is not a science but rather an art. You see in science, chemistry specifically, you can use a certain formula and get the exact same outcome every time. You can control the input and outcome of the scientific process. But as a parent you can "pour in" the same amount of love, discipline, and morals into each one of your children and get different outcomes.

12 Toxic Thoughts You Need To Drop

3/10/2014

BY CAROL MORGAN

One of my mottoes is “Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life!” I’m a big believer that our thoughts and emotions shape our experiences. The problem is that most people aren’t even aware of their negative thoughts. It’s almost like they have just become a habit, so it seems normal to them. Here are 12 common toxic thoughts that you need to drop in order to have a better life: