HAPPY? - HOW'S YOUR ATTITUDE BEEN LATELY?
by Frances J. Harvey, Director of Operations

It has been said that happy people have an “attitude of gratitude.”

This Thanksgiving season it might seem harder to be grateful because of the state of the economy. Everyone is affected by what is happening on Wall Street. We are all looking for and thinking of ways to cut back on our budget, some are considering getting a second job or changing their job to one that may pay more.

There are those who face the possibility of losing their home and job; entertainment, family vacations, and eating out are dwindling…. We could look at this dilemma that the world is in and say there is no hope of things getting better – losing our grateful attitude which leads to not being happy.

But – in spite of it all, what does scripture say? In Phil 4:6 the Lord tell us to “Be anxious for nothing, BUT in EVERYTHING by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving (or gratitude) let your requests be made know to God!”

He didn’t just say in the good times, or in the times that we are prosperous or if there are no trials – but in EVERYTHING! We are to ‘give thanks’ for all we have. But you may say “It’s too hard to be thankful with everything that’s going on in my life.” How can i possibly be grateful?

WHAT IS GRATEFULNESS?

Definition: Gratitude, appreciation, or thankfulness is a positive emotion or attitude in acknowledgment of a benefit that one has received or will receive. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gratitude)

The Hebrew term for gratitude is hikarat hatov, which means, literally, "recognizing the good." Practicing gratitude means recognizing the good that is already yours.

I remember when I was young there was a song we sang in church called “Count Your Blessings.” When things seemed to get overwhelming in my life or I was feeling sorry for myself and overall just feeling unhappy, I would start to sing that song to myself. (Imagine someone walking around in the mall or store singing “Count Your Blessings” out loud. That would make anyone laugh).

God would ALWAYS bring something or someone in my life that reminded me of my many blessings. Here are some of the words…

So, amid the conflict whether great or small  
Do not be discouraged God is over all
Count your many blessings Angels will attend
Help and comfort give you to your journey's end

Count your blessings, name them one by one
Count your blessing, see what God has done
Count your blessing, name them one by one
Count your many blessings see what God has done

Wow! I don’t know about you, but just saying or singing those words out loud can change my outlook! Knowing that God is on the Throne and NOTHING happens without His permission gives me a peace that passes all understanding! That just ‘happens’ to be the next verse - Philippians 4:7 

“And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Actually giving thanks is more of a commandment. The scriptures are loaded with verse on giving thanks. Take some time and look up a few - Col 1:12, Col 3:17, I Tim 2:1 Heb. 13:15, I Thes. 5:16-18.

"...giving thanks always for ALL things to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ" Eph 5:20

If we were really honest with ourselves and just be grateful knowing that Christ died on the cross for my sins and to save me from eternal separation from Him, THAT in its self should be enough.

*Research has also suggested that feelings of gratitude may be beneficial to subjective emotional well-being (Emmons & McCullough, 2003). For example, Watkins and colleagues (Watkins et al., 2003) had participants test a number of different gratitude exercises, such as thinking about a living person for whom they were grateful, writing about someone for whom they were grateful, and writing a letter to deliver to someone for whom they were grateful.

Participants in the control condition were asked to describe their living room. Participants who engaged in a gratitude exercise showed increases in their experiences of positive emotion immediately after the exercise, and this effect was strongest for participants who were asked to think about a person for whom they were grateful. Participants who had grateful personalities to begin with showed the greatest benefit from these gratitude exercises. In people who are grateful in general, life events have little influence on experienced gratitude (McCullough, Tsang & Emmons, 2004).

Although gratitude is something that anyone can experience, some people seem to feel grateful more often than others. People who tend to experience gratitude more frequently than others also tend to be happier, more helpful and forgiving, and less depressed than their less grateful counterparts (Kashdan, Uswatte, & Julian, 2006; McCullough, Emmons, & Tsang, 2002; Watkins, Woodward, Stone, & Kolts, 2003)*

So your attitude is a very important contribution to being happy. Perspective and outlook changes not only your emotional well-being, but it can change how you feel physically, spiritual and mentally as well.

SO YOU ASK – HOW DO I GO ABOUT BEING HAPPY?

Happy people are grateful. They recognize the blessings in all things and consistently show gratitude.
Below is an excerpt from an article entitled “Characteristics of Happy People” by Robin De-Ivy Allen.  Robin encourages you to “take the quiz” and see how many things you can answer yes to.

• Happy people are excited. They have something to look forward to each and every day
   and welcome the new adventures that life has to offer.

• Happy people live with integrity. They live their values. They are honest with themselves
   and others.

• Happy people understand the importance of self care and making sure they consistently
   work toward strengthening their mental fitness.

• Happy people are living their passion. They know why they are on this earth and what they
   are called to do (at this time).

• Happy people know how to stand their ground and speak up for themselves.

• Happy people eat well and focus on feeding their body high quality food.

• Happy people have a regular exercise routine.

• Happy people share and receive lots of love and affection.

• Happy people forgive themselves and they don't beat up on themselves for missteps.

• Happy people want the best for those around them.

• Happy people are optimistic. They practice the art of reframing negative situations to put
  a positive spin on them.

• Happy people have happy friends.

• Happy people sleep well.

• Happy people listen to music often.

• Happy people constantly learn new things and are open to new ideas.

• Happy people practice patience.

• Happy people are spiritual. They understand the power of prayer. They believe that all things
  are possible.

So the next time you find yourself unhappy, fearful, anxious, depressed, etc., ask yourself the question…
“Am I grateful?”If you cannot honestly say that you are…the next question should be “What should I do to become grateful?” God has blessed us with so many things in life. 

Take a moment a make a list of the first 10 things that come to your mind. Just look around you. Even without moving, you can come up with several ways to be grateful. Here’s a hint.

I am grateful because…

I can see
I can hear
I can smell
I can taste
I can feel
…how about I have breath – today I woke up! 

“Count your many blessings name them one by one…” You can’t help but be happy if you do this quick exercise.  You can start each day by a quick simple mental list and thank God for all the blessings in your life. The more gratitude we have, the more we have to be grateful for.

The term for "blessing" in Hebrew is bracha, which comes from the same root as the Hebrew word for "knee." When you say a blessing, it is as if you have bent your knee in an act of gratitude - in an act of worship.

If you are struggling in any area in life and would like to speak to one of our counselors, call TODYA at 800-998-6329. We have over 30 locations in southern California if you are not close to these areas. You can also visit our website at www.TurningPointCounseling.org

“Characteristics of Happy People” by Robin De-Ivy Allen - The material contained in this newsletter has been prepared by an independent third-party provider. The material provided is for informational and educational purposes only. Although the material is deemed to be accurate and reliable, there is no guarantee it is not without errors. Used by permission.